Husiku hwakanaka takagara rimwe gore nemhuri yangu, takaravira tuna pate nemachizi akasiyana-siyana sekudya uye takadya eel negariki, muto wemuriwo, nehuku yeapuro.
Rekodha nguva gore rino, takatanga kudya kwemanheru mangwanani, naXNUMX manheru, kumaXNUMX taive tapedza.
Takanga tapedza kudya kusvika kumaXNUMX o'clock, takagadzirira zvipo zvevana, takasiya zvose zvakaiswa pasi pemuti kuitira kuti Santa Claus asina kuuya, hauzombozivi uye zviri nani kuchengetedzwa pane urombo, isu tese tinoziva kukosha ikoko. illusion is for dwarfs Mushure mekuvhura mapasuru, ndaneta nekuva peji isina kujairika uye intrusive yemurume ane ndebvu chena, ndakaenda kumba kunorota. Mumigwagwa nemigwagwa makange musina mweya, kwete murume aifamba, ndini ndega mugari wenyika, yese yeSantiago de Compostela yaive yangu.
Kunzwa kupi kunoburitsa kunyarara uye kusavapo kwevanhu. Zvinoita sekuti bhomba renyukireya raputika uye hapana kana vapona. Aitarisira kuti maZombi aizobuda chero nguva kubva panzira inorema yemugwagwa weNegreira, aingobvunza Mwari kuti havasi vamwe vevaimhanya.
Hameno kuti sei meya uyu akaisa maroundabouts madiki kudai pasina anoziva mashandisirwo?Kuziva kuti mota irikuuya irikuenda kupi iodyssey yakakodzera vafemberi nevanoshanda navo. Hapana anotevera mitemo. Hapana anoziva mitemo, rezinesi rekutyaira ngaripiwe. Havaisi mablinker kana wabva uye kune vanoaisa nguva yese neimwe nzira kubva pamabatiro avanofanira kuita kana kuti vanozvitora vane chivimbo chekuti mota yavo ine priority pane yako, yatova mukati! anouya kubva mukati kuenda kunze achivharira nzira yako ... zvaanoda ndezvekuti motokari yake, handizivi… yakatsvuka? Hongu ndaizobhadhara kuisa kamera yakavanzika uye kuona antics inoitwa nemunhu wese mukugadzirwa ikoko, mutemo wekumavirira, kana vakaita bvunzo kune vane ruzivo vatyairi vaizofoira zvachose.
Nhasi kwanga kusina matambudziko aya ekutyaira, mugwagwa wese waive wangu ... uye maZombi asingamhanye! rudyi kuenda kuruboshwe nemusoro wakaunyana, shithead! Uchaona kana banga rabaya mumusoro mako.
Nemhuri yangu huru yemhuka handina mukana wekuve kure zvakanyanya. Kutaura zvazviri, pandinoita kudaro, ndinogara ndichibhadhara mumwe munhu kuti achengete mwana. Mhuka vana uye dzimwe nguva dzinopa mabasa akawanda kupfuura vanhu. Asi mumwe nemumwe anorarama hupenyu hwaakasarudza kurarama, kana kuti destiny yaakasarudzira imwe, inyaya refu yekukakavadzana.
Hwave husiku hwekutsanya. Ichokwadi ndechokuti mitambo uye mamiriro okunze anongoerekana aita sezviri kupera mumakore. Paunenge usingazvitarisire, isu tatodzoka muchirimo chakasviba, saka kukurumidza kukuru kunoita kuti ndinzwe dzungu.
Nechekare mambakwedza pamubhedha ndakatambura kushaya hope nekuda kwemarwadzo angu kusvika 7:30 am, pandakazokwanisa kurara, mushure mekutora zvinoshamisa "paracetamol 500 mg" uye kushandisa kwayo balsamic effect.
Mangwana acho ndakamuka na12:30 masikati, ndikanyorovesa ganda rangu nemvura inodziya yaipisa, ndikapfeka jini rangu rakanga rabvaruka, ndakafamba nevanasikana vangu vaviri vanopenga vaiva nemvere, ndokudzokera kumba kwaamai vangu.
Hapana chandinosuwa munyika kuona vazukuru vangu vachitamba nezvipo zvavo, kuona zviso zvavo zvinofara mufananidzo uye vachifarira chikafu cheKisimusi: Scallops! nani pane orgasm! Ndakadzokorora ka3. Handisati ndave ne3 orgasms mumutsara mumakore mangani ...
Mumwe wangu akasvika nenguva dzepfumbamwe mushure mekunge atarisana neKisimusi yake yekutanga pasina baba, mhuri yangu yese uye akadya ipapo kusvika kuma eleven o'clock, panguva iyoyo takadzokera kune zvakasara zve "hupenyu" hwedu.
Dani, ini, uye kutonhora kukuru kwandakabata neruremekedzo rwaSanta Claus. Ndakatopedza 5 rolls dzetoilet paper ndichifuridza mhuno mufekitori iyi yekuhwihwidza nekuhwihwidza.
Iye zvino ndinokunyorera kubva pamubhedha, kubvunda, kutonhora, uye matishu akakandwa kwese kwese, ndinofunga ndine fivha uye furuu yakaipa. Great... ndozvandaida, kutanga gore ndiri mumubhedha.
Pakati pemashiti nemahengechepfu ndiri kuenda kunoona Federico Fellini's La Dolce Vita paDVD.
Mune iyi firimu pane yakanaka monologue inoenda seizvi:
Dzimwe nguva usiku, rima iri uye kunyarara uku kunondidzvinyirira. Rugare runondityisa. Ndinorutya kudarika zvimwe zvinhu zvose. Ndinofungidzira kuti chitarisiko chete, uye chinovanza gehena.
Ndofunga vana vangu vachaonei mangwana, nyika ichanakidza, vanodaro, uye handizivi kuti vari kutariswa nei, kana kufona kunokwana kupedza zvese.
Tinofanira kurarama kunze kwezvishuwo, manzwiro, mukuwirirana kwebasa rakaitwa reunyanzvi, muhurongwa hwakadaro. Tinofanira kudanana zvakakwana kuti tirarame kunze kwenguva, kure.
...kure...
Haina kunaka here? Husiku hwakanaka zuva nezuva, ndiise mukati, ndifukidze, ndinoda kurara.
